Louisiana Voice

My first thought was a spine chilling “He’s baaaaaack!”

Like Freddie Kruger in about a dozen Nightmare on Elm Street movies, Bobby Jindal just won’t go away, I thought

Jindal, the Nightmare of Louisiana, supposedly sent out an email blast announcing his candidacy for the Public Service Commission.

Except it was apparently one of those fake news stories Donald Trump keeps tweeting about.

Jindal, the personification of political disaster, appeared to have made his announcement via email Monday (July 10) at 5:09 p.m. that he will be a candidate for the PUBLIC SERVICE COMMISSION (PSC) District 2 seat formerly held by Scott Angelle, who was APPOINTED by Donald Trump to head up the Federal Bureau of Safety and Environmental Enforcement which regulates offshore drilling.

Here’s a copy of the original email received by LouisianaVoice:

From: Bobby Jindal [mailto:info@americanxt.org]
Sent: Monday, July 10, 2017 4:45 PM
To:
Subject: I’m in

I wanted to make sure your heard—I’m running to represent you on the Public Service Commission!

I’m running because I want to do everything possible to help create jobs and get Louisianians (sic) back to work.

We need leaders fighting for Louisiana’s small businesses. That’s how we’ll get more and better jobs for our state. It’s not going to happen through more government regulations or spending.

I’m a small businessman myself, and I know how important it is to grow our economy. It’s going to take rolling up my sleeves and being willing to get to work, and that’s exactly what I will do.

It’s going to be incredibly important to have your help getting the word about this important race out to your friends and neighbors. I’m asking for your help.

Only it wasn’t really from Jindal.

Someone named Tim Saler followed what we thought was an email from Jindal with a correction at 6:18 p.m. “Due to a technical error, an email from Baton Rouge orthopaedic surgeon Craig Greene was sent to recipients with an incorrect sender’s name. Craig’s campaign is renting multiple lists, and unfortunately one of these lists was inadvertently labeled with a previous sender’s name.”

Imagine our disappointment, even though he did sound a lot like Jindal—and about 10,000 other politicians. For example, he wants us to believe the PSC creates jobs; he’s against regulations of such things as price gouging, illegal dumping of toxic waste, unsafe gas lines and motor carriers. As an orthopaedic surgeon, he somehow considers himself a “small business,” and of course he wants to roll up his sleeves (for a campaign photo-op, no doubt).

One of our sharp-eyed readers informed us that it was worth noting that Greene may be using Jindal’s America Next super PAC and that SALER “is a Jindal-Teepell teammate.” Timmy put him on the ground to work races while he (Timmy) handled television and other media via his ONMESSAGE web page.

Saler is not listed as an Onmessage operative per se, but he was listed as one of Jindal’s 2016 presidential KEY STAFFERS. Our source said the word is that Jindal and Teepell are grooming Greene to run for governor.

Gov. John Bel Edwards appointed former State Rep. DAMON J. BALDONE to complete Angelle’s unexpired term until a special election can be held. While Edwards has yet to call the election, it will most likely be Oct. 14. Baldone, a Houma attorney, has indicated he will seek the office on a permanent basis.

PSC DISTRICT 2 is comprised of the parishes of Lafourche, Terrebonne, St. Mary, St. Martin, Lafayette, West Baton Rouge Pointe Coupee, West and East Feliciana, and parts of East Baton Rouge, Livingston, and Iberville.

Despite the correction sent out by Saler, the very idea of Jindal as a candidate for PSC got me to reminiscing about his eight years of misrule as Louisiana’s absentee governor.

You do remember, Bobby Jindal, right? He’s the guy who thought he would make a good presidential candidate. Remember that hilarious video of him announcing his intentions to his kids? Remember their rousing indifference? Much like the voters’ reactions in Iowa. He would have probably received the same accolades in New Hampshire had his campaign made it that far.

Remember, too, his relegation to the Republican Party’s kiddie table in the debates? That was classic.

Of course, once Donald Trump was the official Republican nominee, Jindal gave his whorehearted wholehearted endorsement and Trump responded in kind with a puzzled “Bobby who?”

And you must remember Jindal’s landmark LSU Hospital deal that LouisianaVoice said all along was illegal because of the contract with the new operator of the hospitals in Monroe and Shreveport contained 50 BLANK PAGES. Remember how we speculated that the Center for Medicare and Medicaid Services (CMS) would reject the plan?

Of course, Bobby didn’t really care because he knew he would be long gone by the time the chickens came home to roost.

And come home they did, demanding that the state repay $190 million CMS said the state owed on the fraudulent deal.

State Rep. John Bel Edwards was against the hospital deal from the get-go and as governor, it fell to him to resolve the problem Bobby created.

And while Edwards has precious little credit, he has managed to talk CMS down from $190 million to $5 million through extended NEGOTIATIONS.

Thanks, Bobby.

And of course, Bobby’s first experiment with privatization was with the Office of Risk Management, a privatization deal that was supposed to save the state tens of millions of dollars.

Except it hasn’t. In fact, the company that was paid to take it over, came back within just a few months asking that its contract be increased by 10 percent, which it was—and then the contract was sold to another company without the prior approval of the Division of Administration as was required by the original transfer. Now, LouisianaVoice is hearing rumors of internal complaining because the private operator isn’t pulling its weight and the few remaining state employees are having to carry the bulk of the workload.

Thanks, Bobby.

Remember how Bobby gave us eight consecutive years of budgetary shortfalls followed by draconian cuts to services and higher education? Remember how the cost of tuition at Louisiana colleges and universities skyrocketed under eight years of Jindal?

Thanks, Bobby.

And remember how Bobby squelched that lawsuit against those 97 oil companies that had inflicted so much carnage on the state’s coastal marshes?

Next time a category 4 or 5 hurricane slams into Morgan City, New Orleans or anywhere else along what’s left of our coastline, be sure to thank Bobby for there being no barrier islands to slow the progress of that hurricane.

And of course, there’s that disastrous BP Deepwater-Horizon-oil-spill-of-2010 that killed 11 men and spilled 4.9 million barrels of oil over an area estimated as high as 68,000 square miles.

Remember Bobby’s solution? Build berms! Against the advice of all the expert engineers, Bobby insisted he was a genius and could mitigate the damage by spending $220 million to construct sand berms to stem the flow of oil to Louisiana’s shore.

Well, guess what? The berms, along with the bulldozers and cranes brought in for the project were washed away in a matter of hours. Gone. Much like his credibility.

The Oil Spill Commission staff described Jindal’s SAND PILE as “underwhelmingly effective and overwhelmingly expensive.”

Much like Jindal’s eight years in office.

Thanks, Bobby.

Still, after all that, the image of Jindal sitting on the PSC wouldn’t go away. Utility rate increases? Why not? It’s private enterprise; they have a right to make a profit. Transportation costs? Go ahead, fellas, charge whatever the market will bear and don’t worry about regulation.

But best of all was my visual of a showdown between Jindal and sitting PSC member Foster Campbell, everyone’s favorite populist.

Jindal’s staccato rhetoric, empty of any real substance, versus Campbell’s bombastic oratory. It would be like a debate between Tweety Bird and Foghorn Leghorn:

“Slow, Ah say, slow down, boy. You sound like a 33^1/3 rpm record bein’ played on 78. (That boy talks like he has to be somewhere—like th’ restroom.)”