Louisiana Voice

The next time you are a patient in a hospital, check your bill closely to see how much you’re charged for incidentals such as tissues, Tylenol, etc.

I say this because the Louisiana Illuminator ran an interesting story earlier this month about how so-called nonprofit hospitals are plowing literally millions of dollars into naming rights for stadia and arenas across the country.

And right here at home, the Illuminator pointed out, Our Lady of the Lake Medical Center in Baton Rouge has offered to pony up (hold on, wait for it)… A COOL $50 MILLION to slap its name on LSU’s proposed new basketball arena.

You think medical costs are through the roof? Consider that that proposed $50 million would come from a nonprofit hospital. Think what a for-profit could afford!

The article quoted a spokesperson for Clemson University as saying that branding a stadium or arena “can improve a hospital system’s name recognition…”

Really? Does a single warm-blooded individual residing in the Baton Rouge metropolitan area seriously believe Our Lady of the Lake, known colloquially simply as OLOL, actually needs better name recognition?

But wait. Let’s take a jaunt about 20 or so miles down the ol’ Mississippi River to the Ascension Parish town of Donaldsonville.

In Donaldsonville, the median income is about $24,000, compared to $32,400 for the state of Louisiana and about $40,000 for the U.S.

In Donaldsonville, approximately 42.9 percent of the town’s 7,000 residents live below the poverty line. That’s more than double the state average of 18.9 percent and nearly three times as high as the state level of 16 percent and almost four times as high as the U.S. average of 11.1 percent.

Donaldson also was (with emphasis on was) the home of Prevost Hospital, operated by Ascension Parish. But as of March 2023, OLOL entered into a cooperative agreement with the parish whereby the parish would pay OLOL (again, hold on) $360,000 per month for the first 12 months – after which time the monthly payment was scheduled to be “renegotiated.”

That comes to just north of $4.3 million per year – and the agreement was for 10 years. Do the math. That’s almost enough to underwrite the total cost of slapping OLOL to the roof of the new LSU basketball arena.

The two parties further agreed, according to terms stipulated in the cooperative agreement, that “in the event the monthly payments plus contractor billing collections (did I mention that the agreement also gives OLOL the right to bill patients and insurers for all services?) are not sufficient to meet the costs of services provided by the contractor (OLOL), such that total expenses exceed monthly collections, contractor (OLOL) will reduce services to fall in alignment with the cost of services…”

So, what does OLOL agree to provide on its part, other than giving itself an option to “reduce services”?

Well, for one, it was supposed to provide a mental health clinic for the parish.

Oh, and it was also supposed to provide drug counselors for the parish.

More than two years down the road, neither has been forthcoming. Maybe those were the services that had to be “reduced” if the hospital operated at a deficit.

Looks like a pretty one-sided deal from this vantage point – one-sided heavily weighted in favor of OLOL.

But the question that continues to hang heavy over the entire subject is why would a major nonprofit medical facility run by the Franciscans want to paste its name all over a sports arena? is that what the Franciscans are about, name recognition?

Of course, there’s the perk of OLOL board members getting cushy box seats at sporting events for their generosity…

Well, there’s also this: remember when a guy named Jindal went on a privatization rampage a few years back? Remember how the decision was made to close Big Charity Hospital in New Orleans following Katrina? That was a godsend for Repugnantcans in their drive to privatize and to reward their friends with lucrative contracts (see: private prisons).

Remember how Earl K. Long charity hospital in Baton Rouge was shut down by Jindal? He also privatized charity hospitals in Monroe and Shreveport. But in Baton Rouge, who do you think took over the EKL caseload?

The nonprofit OLOL, that’s who. They got all those state payments for caring for Medicaid patients, including state prisoners. That’s a pretty good windfall. Could it be that OLOL was told it was going to kick in that $50 million and that the LSU arena thing could be considered payback?

Check your itemized hospital bill carefully. You might have purchased a basketball jersey somewhere in there.

On the one hand, you have to admit that Gov. Landry’s decision to prohibit recipients of Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program (SNAP) benefits from using those benefits to purchase soft drinks, energy drinks or candy is a good thing, right up there with the prohibition of buying liquor and tobacco products.

On the other hand, you have to scratch your head and wonder why it took a bona fide nut case like Robert Kennedy, Jr. to convince Landry to take the long overdue action.

“Gone are the days of taxpayers subsidizing unhealthy lifestyles and eating habits,” Landry announced somewhat self-righteously, adding that Louisiana is now officially participating in Kennedy’s Make America Health Again (MAHA) movement.

The state’s Surgeon General (read: political payoff recipient) Dr. Ralph Abraham added that the change in state policy governing SNAP benefits is “phenomenal” and that “Good nutrition is a critical piece of living a healthy life.”

Seriously? It took someone like brain-worm-infected Robert Kennedy to convince these two clowns that Cokes and Snickers don’t constitute the best eating habits?

To me, it just seems the MAGHATS are just sitting back and waiting for the next catchphrase to be handed them by the shallow-thinking “leaders” in the Beltway who don’t seem to be able to think beyond the next snappy slogan to fire up their base.

As evidence of this, I offer as evidence:

• “Witch-hunt”
• “Hoax”
• “Lock her up”
• “Woke”
• “Trade wars”
• “Alternative facts”
• “Bigly”
• “Antifa”
• “China virus”
• *“America first”
• “Deep state”
• “Fake news”
• “Enemy of the people”
• “Loser”
• “Owning the libs”
• “Alt-right”

Originality, it seems, is not their strong suit.

*(first offered as a slogan by the KKK in 1927)

Wanna job at Mar-A-Largo?

Those of us with halfway decent memories will remember that it was our very own Billy Tauzin who negotiated this law on his way out the door of the House and on to his next job: President and CEO of the Pharmaceutical Research and Manufacturers of America.

Just good guvmint at work, folks!

Several years back, actually, about 40-something years back, I was on the floor of the Louisiana House and came to observe something that I found to be a tad peculiar. I noticed that on every single vote to come to the floor, State Rep. Shady Wall (was that not a perfect name for a Louisiana legislator/) of West Monroe was voting “yes.”

Now, Shady was something of a maverick and it just wasn’t like him to be so consistent in his floor votes. Curious, I made my way up to a point where I had a close view of his desk. He was nowhere in sight. But on his desk was a stack of documents and I noticed a yellow pencil wedged between the stack and the “yes” button, holding it down so that he was recorded as voting on every bill.

Trouble was, Shady had pulled an Elvis and left the building, headed back to West Monroe.

I scampered downstairs to my office and retrieved my camera and telephoto lens and ran back to my position and zoomed in on his desk. The photo that I took that day ran four columns wide on his hometown newspaper, The Ouachita Citizen. I don’t know for sure if the picture influenced his decision or not, but Shady didn’t run for reelection.

I tell this story to illustrate how U.S. Sens. John N. Kennedy and Bill Cassidy must undoubtedly have pencils holding their yes-buttons down to record affirmative votes on every one of Donald Trump’s nominees, no matter their background or record.

Bear in mind, Kennedy likes to think of himself as a constitutional lawyer, meaning that he must be, by definition, a champion of the rule of law. So, why then, would he ever consider a thumbs-up vote to affirm someone like Emil Bove III to a lifetime seat on a federal bench? Bove is a guy who represented Trump and actually said (no kidding) that a president could ignore a federal judge’s order.

How’s that square up with rule of law, Mr. Kennedy? The vote to confirm Bove was a razor-thin 50-49. Your vote might have been the one that put him over the top. Proud of yourself?

And how is it that whistleblower documents, filed with the U.S. Justice Department was last May somehow got overlooked? The answer to that, of course, is that it’s no longer the U.S. Justice Department, it’s the Trump Justice Department. It would be interesting to hear Kennedy and Cassidy explain how they’ve been so willing to look the other way on that and so many other ethical questions that have arisen in the six months Trumps reassumed the reins. The Bove confirmation is just the latest.

From my point of view as an observer, the answer is pretty obvious: Louisiana’s two U.S. senators have whored out their own values, principles and very souls to be trafficked to the highest bidder, in this case, the TACO Pimp.