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Okay, after much deliberation, soul-searching, and with encouragement from family and friends (and co-workers who just want me go somewhere, anywhere else), it is with tongue planted firmly in cheek that I announce my candidacy for governor of the gret stet of looziana.

I am offering my services with a fairly simple no-frills platform. Some of the individual planks in my platform are certain to offend some very influential people—and that’s a good thing. So, without fanfare, frills or equivocation, and with the promise of no compromise, here is that platform:

No out-of-state campaigning for any Democrat or Republican candidate. My first responsibility will be to the citizens of Louisiana, not some two-faced, lying parasite who has never held a real job. Besides, I’m an independent. Plus, I don’t trust any politician. And no out-of-state travel for book signings, either;

Merge several universities and junior colleges throughout the state and convert some four-year schools to junior college status. Failing that, at least merge some of the programs—such as the law schools at Southern University and LSU in Baton Rouge. With the help of a reluctant legislature, this will cut duplication in athletic scholarships, salaries of coaches and university administrators, and in replicated programs;

Turn over all operations of the Governor’s Office of Homeland Security (otherwise known as the Governor’s Patronage Department) to the State Police where it was originally and should be again. If you recall, the administration pushed through a constitutional amendment in October that changed the Office of Homeland Security from classified (civil service) to non-classified (appointive) so that Homeland Security employees may receive any size pay raise the administration deems appropriate. Civil service employees, meanwhile, have their merit raises frozen indefinitely;

Eliminate the lieutenant governor’s office and assign the duties of that office to the secretary of state. Hey, it worked with the elections commission;

Have the Office of Contractual Review do its job by reviewing ALL contracts, including consulting contracts, to determine need;

Use the governor’s line-item veto to cut wasteful spending and to balance the state budget instead of laying off employees who have families to support, college tuition and home mortgages to pay, and who need health insurance;

In lieu of layoffs, offer state employees the option of accepting a pay cut of 7.5 to 10% for those making $50,000 to $100,000; 15% for those making up to $200,000; 20% for salaries of $200,000 to $300,000, and 25% for anyone making more than $300,000. Most employees would opt for a pay cut if it meant saving their jobs but sadly, the present administration has never even considered this option. Legislators would also be required to take a 25% cut. In fact, cut cabinet level salaries altogether;

Sell off all state golf courses. No additional explanation necessary;

Revisit the sacred Homestead Exemption (see? It’s even capitalized.);

Increase tobacco and alcohol taxes to at least the national average. If people are going to kill themselves with their indulgences, at least make ‘em pay for the privilege and make ‘em pay for the use of our charity hospital system when they develop catastrophic illnesses related to their vices;

Pass a constitutional amendment that future budget cuts, when necessary, won’t affect education or health care (someone needs to do this.);

Block computer games and internet access to legislators on Senate and House floors during legislative sessions;

Require all lobbyists to register with the Secretary of State (they already register with the House Speaker, but that’s too close to the center of power) and assess a hefty registration fee for all lobbyists except for non-profits;

Discontinue publishing legislative acts and other legal news in the Baton Rouge newspaper. This practice is cost prohibitive now that we have the free internet;

Enact a tough ethics code with real teeth. Bar any gifts to legislators, including meals, drinks, parties, etc. Any lobbyist violating said act shall be subject to severe fines and shall be barred from all future legislative sessions. Any legislator violating said act shall be subject to heavy fines and forfeiture of legislative pay for duration of his/her term of office.

Consolidate investigative agencies. Louisiana currently has five investigative agencies: the attorney general’s office, the ethics commission, the inspector general, the state police investigation program and the legislative auditor. Total budget for the five agencies: $55 million. Because the present administration has already gutted, stripped, and otherwise neutered the ethics commission. I suggest the state police absorb the auditor’s office, the inspector general, and ethics commission and that any investigations now pending with the latter three agencies be turned over to the state police. You may have noticed that the attorney general was left out of the loop. That’s because the AG is elected and as such, is a politician and not to be trusted with any investigation of state officials.

There you have it: my complete platform. Oh, wait. There is one more: No campaign contributions shall be accepted from any person, organization, foundation, PAC, or lobbyist.

I guess I should go ahead and write my concession speech now.

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If there’s a single word that could describe both the political and fiscal plight of Louisiana, that word would be chaotic. Absentee governor also comes to mind.

Gov. Bobby Jindal, when he’s not flying off to any of a growing number of other states to campaign for Republican candidates, is telling cabinet members and department heads to lead and to stop “whining” about proposed budget cuts that threaten to further stymie the state’s already stagnant economy and to gut higher education.

College presidents from one end of the state to the other are grappling with ways to keep from shutting down academic programs and laying off professors and teachers. The college presidents challenged Jindal’s Facebook criticism of the state’s colleges and universities for “underperforming” and for their “inefficiency.”

Professors also are entering the fray, openly criticizing the governor for everything from chronic absenteeism to insensitivity toward higher education as manifested by the administration’s deep budgetary cuts.

One legislator, perhaps with some measure of justification, or perhaps with an eye on the governor’s office in next year’s election, likewise accused Jindal of being absent from the state in a time of crisis.

Rep. John Bel Edwards of Amite described Jindal as absent without leave during “the most serious budget crisis in our history.” Edwards, a Democrat, said that Jindal “is not minding the store” and has been less than honest with Louisiana’s citizens about problems facing the state.

Edwards isn’t alone among legislators in offering criticism of the governor’s repeated optimistic proclamations on his statewide “Building a Better Louisiana for Our Children” tour. Press releases from the governor’s office quote Jindal as saying his administration is “doing more with less” and has “significantly cut government spending and reduced the size of government—while pursuing innovative programs that are more effective at providing services for our people.”

Several state senators, however, have called Jindal to task for what they feel is a lack of candor. The said he should be more straightforward about the types of severe budget cuts that will be necessary in order to balance next year’s budget. They said Jindal has been misleading the public in talking up cost savings and office consolidations while refusing to acknowledge the far-reaching budget cuts that will be needed to close the budget gap.

The president of the LSU student body gained national publicity recently when he wrote to a newspaper in New Hampshire where Jindal was campaigning. The letter asked the governor to return home and address the budgetary problems facing higher education. Only when J. Ryan Hudson’s letter got national attention did Jindal finally agree to meet with students to discuss cuts to higher education.

More recently, an LSU professor voiced similar sentiments, saying Jindal should do his job and “stop playing games.” A.R.P. Rau added that the governor, while critical of university sabbatical policies, failed to appreciate the irony that he is often “absent without leave from the state, neglecting it for his personal national aspirations.”

Perhaps the most significant criticism, however, came from Ed Steimel, retired president of the Louisiana Association of Business and Industry (LABI). Steimel, calling himself a longtime supporter of Jindal, now describes the governor as “a major disappointment” and said he no longer supports him. Steimel-perhaps with tongue in cheek, but perhaps not-even suggested that Hudson and Jindal swap jobs.

State Treasurer John Kennedy, sounding more and more like a potential 2011 challenger to his fellow Republican, has offered his own plan to balance the state budget now estimated to be more than $100 million in the red. Kennedy said his 16-point plan would produce an overall savings of $2.6 billion.

The governor’s office, even as it was responding to the college presidents, launched a web page dedicated to criticizing Kennedy’s proposals, with Commissioner of Administration Paul Rainwater saying that the state treasurer’s ideas were “unworkable.” Kennedy angrily responded to Rainwater, saying, “Tell me you don’t want to do it. Tell me you don’t have the political courage to do it. But don’t tell me it can’t be done.”

When he became governor, Jindal increased the size of the Louisiana Board of Ethics by more than two-thirds, from 23 to 39 staff positions but now has directed the agency to cut staff by 35 percent. Ethics Board Chairman Frank Simoneaux said personnel cuts would be “particularly egregious to us.” He said the board already in understaffed for it to perform the duties it is charged by law to do.

Department of Health and Hospitals Secretary Bruce Greenstein sent an Oct. 22 agency-wide email in which he said Jindal was “committed to providing the core health-care services and programs that our residents need.” At the same time, however, Greenstein announced a reorganization that “will lead to a reduction in staff.”

Even as Greenstein was parroting Jindal’s commitment to needed health-care services, physicians and legislators alike leveled stinging criticism of Jindal’s decision last week to scrap CommunityCare, a program which mainly serves children in providing primary-care physicians for Medicaid patients throughout Louisiana. By eliminating the extra $3 per patient per month paid physicians to coordinate care of individual Medicaid patients, Jindal said he hopes to cut spending by $16 million.

Nor is the governor the only one to incur the wrath of some observers. The same growing feeling of general frustration was also directed at the legislature.

A Baton Rouge retiree offered a proposal which isn’t likely to get many takers. He suggested that whenever cuts are necessary, legislators should be first in line to sacrifice. Bill Fontaine of the Baton Rouge suburb of Central said that would mean that salaries, staff, perks, and any other costs of making the legislature run must be cut proportionate to any cuts to higher education. “….imagine the legislators working for free when there is no budget to pay them…..” he said.

“But you see,” he added, “I’m a pessimist about legislative courage. I don’t think they have the courage to forgo some pay and/or benefits for the good of the people. They are just cowards and greedy grabbers….”

Even the Associated Press is beginning to call attention to Jindal’s growing propensity to speak of Louisiana’s economy in more glowing terms than its citizens back home can see.

Saying that the governor seems more focused on his own political future than on problems back home, AP points out that Jindal conveniently leaves out the bad news about the state’s finances when describing his administration’s accomplishments during appearances in other states.

The latest example of Jindal’s apparent propensity to embellish his image of the state came as recently as Oct. 27 in Wisconsin.

Appearing on behalf of eventual winning gubernatorial candidate Scott Walker, Jindal and Governors Bob McDonnell of Virginia and Haley Barbour of Mississippi told Wisconsin voters that their strategies of cutting taxes and shrinking government worked in their states. Their pronouncements prompted Walker to call the three his inspiration when he is asked how he will create jobs and make government smaller. Calling them “great leaders,” Walker said, “They did it and we’re going to do it.”

Jindal boasted that Louisiana’s economy improved when he cut or repealed tax increases passed under his Democratic predecessor Kathleen Blanco, adding that Americans need leaders who can balance budgets, create jobs, and cut taxes. (Actually, the Stelly Plan to which he was apparently alluding, was passed in 2002, the final year of Republican Gov. Mike Foster’s administration.)

The “improved” economy of Louisiana is wrestling with the current budget deficit of $106 million. As if that were not sufficiently severe, next year’s deficit is pegged—by the Jindal administration itself—at $1.6 billion while others project an even bigger budgetary shortfall.

Back home in Louisiana, however, Jindal said it will be necessary for cabinet members and department heads to deliver better value with fewer dollars. “We don’t need whining. We do need leadership,” he said at a Capitol press conference. Then, apparently satisfied to leave the leadership to others, he immediately left for Pittsburgh to attend a fundraiser for the Republican gubernatorial candidate in Pennsylvania.

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J. Ryan Hudson made the most of his 15 minutes.

Just in case you haven’t been paying attention lately, J. Ryan Hudson is the LSU Student Body president who wrote the now-famous op-ed letter to the Keene (New Hampshire) Sentinel in which he opined that Gov. Bobby Jindal “is spending more time in your state than the one he was elected to represent.”

As class sizes at LSU have grown, higher education has undergone $280 million in budget cuts over the past two years and is facing another $290 million in cutbacks, prompting Hudson to write that Jindal should pay more attention to state budget shortfalls than spending time campaigning for Republican candidates in other states.

“On behalf of the students whose hopes for a brighter future will soon be crushed, I beg you to return to Louisiana and fix your state’s serious problems,” Hudson said. “You’ve neglected your constituents long enough.

“You’ll have a much better chance of becoming president if you save, instead of destroy, Louisiana’s universities,” he said, implying that Jindal may have a not-so-secret agenda aimed at seeking higher office.

To be sure, Hudson’s letter was brash, maybe a little rude, and certainly timely.

And, sadly, all too accurate.

Jindal, rather than anchoring himself to the Capitol’s fourth floor office, chooses to globetrot on behalf of Republican candidates most in Louisiana have never heard of while refusing to endorse Republican candidates in Louisiana. One can understand his reluctance to speak out in favor of David Vitter in his Senate race against Charlie Melancon given Vitter’s political baggage, but Secretary of State Jay Dardenne can’t wrangle an endorsement from Jindal even though Dardenne’s TV spots stress his wish to work with Jindal in promoting the governor’s programs.

Even more difficult to comprehend is Jindal’s reluctance to tackle state finances head-on. After all, hasn’t he been telling us over and over that he has the job he wants? If that’s true, then he should stay home and do that job.

Oh, sure, he pays lip service to reducing, or streamlining, state government. But as the state budget turns an ever-darkening shade of red, he stands adamant in his refusal to address a tax increase in the wake of dwindling state revenues.

Tax increases are never pleasant, especially with statewide elections only a year away, but neither is the prospect of a state becoming insolvent. That’s a very real prospect.

And Jindal, along with an out-of-control legislature, must shoulder the blame. The state had money, but the legislature, drunk with one-time revenue, went spend-crazy this year and Jindal wouldn’t—or couldn’t—summon the courage to rein in the insanity with his line item veto power.

Time magazine describes half the states as having joined the federal government “in the fiscal sick ward” as high unemployment and the recession combined with drastically reduced income to deliver a weakened economy that appears at times to be spiraling out of control.

Barely into its new fiscal year, Louisiana is already facing a $100 million deficit, thanks to depressed oil prices and reduced tax revenues, the magazine said. To deal with the crisis, the state has frozen hiring, deferred maintenance on state buildings and canceled $500,000 in new equipment. Legislators, meanwhile, are talking tax increases. “We’ve run out of windfall from Washington,” the state budget director lamented. “We’ve run out of exotic tax measures. Our economy has run out of gas, and in Louisiana, when you run out of gas, you run out of money.”

Sound familiar? The by now all too familiar theme should resonate with anyone who follows Louisiana politics.

But that story actually ran in Time on Nov. 8, 1982—almost exactly 28 ominously prophetic years ago when Ralph Perlman was budget director and Dave Treen was governor. Louisiana has held seven elections and has chosen five new governors since then. The more things change, it seems, the more they stay the same.

Today, nearly three decades after that story, Louisiana is wrestling with a $108 million budget deficit less than four months into the 2011 fiscal year than began on July 1. Even worse, the administration is anticipating a staggering projected shortfall of up to $2 billion next year.

It’s not as if the administration and legislators were not forewarned: Greg Albrecht, the chief economist for the Legislative Fiscal Office, said in May that he didn’t expect state income tax revenue to meet earlier forecasts.

Now, Gov. Bobby Jindal finds himself trying to find a way to cut state budgets yet another 35 percent—when he’s in the state, which is becoming more and more infrequent. Some legislators said they see the present fiscal malaise as a chance to downsize government in lieu of falling back on the usual accounting tricks to balance the budget.

Sen. John Alario, D-Westwego, called the situation “a grand opportunity for us to scale back government.” Alario, the legislator primarily responsible for the often-criticized state’s $22 million purchase of the financially troubled Players Tournament Club golf facility in Marrero, said downsizing “could never be done if you didn’t have to be faced with this situation.”

Jindal, in lieu of raising taxes, seems intent on slashing higher education and health care. Meanwhile, he keeps popping up in Florida, New Hampshire, New York, Missouri, Georgia, California, Ohio, and Minnesota to campaign for GOP candidates.

Legislators say the anticipated budgets will close hospitals for the poor and cripple higher education while college presidents call the proposed cuts “catastrophic.” Former Gov. Kathleen Blanco says a 35 percent cut would effectively shut down government services and that education would undergo a “meltdown to mediocrity.”

Jindal says spending cuts are preferable to higher taxes and that additional privatization may be in store as a means to save the state money.

He missed his chance to cut spending at the end of the last regular legislative session when he could have exercised his line item veto power to bring the Capital Outlay bill more into line. He had the opportunity to veto more than $450 million in Priority One spending but chose to veto only $9.4 million—all in Priority Two, or second year spending. Among the Priority One appropriations in the Capital Outlay Bill that were allowed to stand were:

• $800,000 for land acquisition for the proposed Allen Parish Reservoir;
• $1.4 million for the proposed Bayou Dechene Reservoir in Caldwell Parish;
• $2.6 million for the Washington Parish Reservoir Commission Feasibility study;
• $17.2 million for Bayou Segnette Festival Park land acquisition and sports complex improvements;
• $28 million for modifications to the Performing Arts Center in Jefferson Parish;
• $2 million for construction of a playground Basketball Gym in Orleans Parish;
• $1.8 million for construction of the Little Theatre of Shreveport;
• $2.6 million for a new Westbank YMCA in Algiers;
• $2 million for the New Orleans Music Hall of Fame;
• $6 million for construction of a new courthouse in Baton Rouge;
• $2.8 million for the Dryades YMCA in New Orleans;
• $5.4 million for the Red River Waterway Commission;
• $7.7 million for the renovation of the Acadiana Center for the Arts in Lafayette;
• $2.5 million for improvements to the Coteau Water System in St. Martin and Iberia parishes;
• $2.4 million for the Union Parish Law Enforcement District;
• $1.8 million for construction for the Robinson Film Center in Caddo Parish;
• $12 million for construction of a convention center complex in Shreveport;
• $3.8 million for a new tennis center in Orleans Parish;
• $4.7 million for construction of the Louisiana Artist Guild Arts Incubator in New Orleans;
• $26.5 million for expansion and construction of the National World War II Museum in New Orleans;

Millions more were spent on construction projects that included recreational facilities, councils on aging, courthouses, sheriffs’ offices, jails, drainage projects, work on parish and municipal road and street construction projects, community centers, and water systems.

As if that were not enough, when legislators found extra money lying around, as they always seem to do during each legislative session, the House quickly pushed HB 76 through, appropriating an additional $33 million in local pork projects. Some of those expenditures:

• $150,000 for the Louisiana Political Hall of Fame in Winnfield;
• $500,000 for the Louisiana Endowment for the Humanities;
• $500,000 to “organizations which assist small towns and rural areas with their water and wastewater systems;”
• $250,000 for construction of an animal shelter in St. Charles Parish;
• $1 million to the Lafayette Parish Consolidated Government for infrastructure construction;

Of that $33 million, Jindal vetoed only 32 projects totaling less than $2.5 million.

That’s a sign of a weak governor—one who lacks the singular courage to scale back reckless spending by legislators when the very future of the state depends on it, demands it. As a result, higher education and health care will continue to suffer while golf courses, community centers, baseball parks, sheriffs’ offices, ground water reservoirs, and other local projects will flourish while legislators take the credit and bask in the gratitude of constituents back home.

The name of that 1982 Time magazine article that chronicled economic hard times for state governments?

“Living Beyond Their Means.”

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Louisiana’s Superintendent of Education doesn’t seem to be very smart. But don’t worry, he appears to have plenty company.

Paul Pastorek, originally appointed by Gov. Kathleen Blanco and retained by Bobby Jindal, is quick to blame the teachers of any school or school system that is shown to be failing.

But when test scores improve, guess who takes full credit? Okay, that was too easy.

But to repeat, he doesn’t seem to be very smart, especially for a lawyer, the occupational genus from which he was plucked to save Louisiana public education.

Taking the typical legal approach, Pastorek, without ever admitting actual culpability, earlier this month said he would repay the state $4,185 for dozens of private trips taken in a state vehicle by Paul Vallas, head the department’s Recovery School District. Both Pastorek and Vallas have insisted they were unaware that it was improper to take the Dodge Durango out of state on personal business, including several trips to visit family in Chicago. It was on one of the Chicago trips that Vallas wrecked the state car, the incident that led to the discovery of its out-of-state use.

What part of “improper use” don’t they understand?

In June, Higher Education Commissioner Sally Clausen resigned after it became public that she had furtively retired in August of 2009 without informing the Board of Regents, her bosses, only to be rehired after missing exactly one day of work. While entirely legal, the resulting flak caused her to become, in her own words, a “constant distraction.” The retire-rehire move netted her a $90,000 payout for unused sick leave and vacation time and entitled her to an annual pension of $146,400 on top of her regular salary.

It is still not certain as to who was responsible for “re-hiring” her. The Board of Regents is the hiring authority for the commissioner’s position and no member of the board has ever acknowledged knowing of her move in advance or indeed, for a full nine months after the fact. And she couldn’t very well re-hire herself, given the fact that she had resigned her position.

For questionable actions that may not necessarily be illegal but which have raised eyebrows for their apparent indiscretion, one need only pick a year. Take 2005, for example. In March of that year, Commissioner of Insurance Robert Wooley apparently felt his department needed a $40,000 special Harley-Davidson edition Ford truck, complete with heated seats, a camper package, diesel engine, red flames painted on the side, and a CD changer.

Wooley said he saw the vehicle on a car lot and wanted it so he traded in a year-old Eddie Bauer-designer edition Ford Expedition with only 30,000 miles on it. “I ain’t going to jail,” Wooley sniffed. “I sleep well every night.”

Edwin Edwards went to jail. So did former Commissioner of Elections Jerry Fowler and Commissioners of Insurance Sherman Bernard and Doug Green. Likewise Agriculture Commissioner Gil Dozier, three consecutive sheriffs in St. Helena Parish, and several judges in Orleans and Jefferson parishes. Former Congressman William Jefferson appears headed for jail for corruption and Federal Judge Thomas Porteous just underwent a rigorous impeachment trial with the U.S. Senate expected to render its verdict by Thanksgiving. Insurance Commissioner Jim Brown also went to jail but on the flimsiest of charges, that of lying to the FBI in an informal interview.

Senator David Vitter and former Congressman Bob Livingston both became involved in extra-marital affairs. Vitter’s was with a prostitute and Livingston’s affair was revealed at the same time he was calling for Bill Clinton’s resignation over the president’s Monica Lewinsky scandal. Livingston subsequently resigned from Congress only to emerge as a major player among the K Street lobbyists in Washington.

Vitter was considered vulnerable until Chet Traylor, a former Louisiana Supreme Court justice, decided to run against him and in so doing ended up making Vitter look good by comparison. Not only did Traylor have an affair with a Winnsboro legislator’s wife, but after they married and she later died, he began an affair with his stepson’s ex-wife. Traylor, who initially was considered a viable candidate, ended up with about 7 percent of the vote in the Republican primary.

In August, a federal jury in Shreveport convicted former State Senator Charles Jones of Monroe of tax evasion.

Just last week New Orleans Deputy Mayor Greg St. Etienne resigned. Hired by Mayor Mitch Landrieu to supervise the city’s chief financial office, he is accused of misuse of $500,000 in federal loans at a nonprofit organization he once ran.

Then there is Eddie Jordan, the man who put Edwin Edwards away.

Jordan, who succeeded Harry Connick as Orleans Parish district attorney, became embroiled in controversy almost from the day he took office. He summarily fired all his white assistant district attorneys who promptly filed suit. A jury found in favor of the fired workers and awarded them $3.7 million.

Jordan also came under heavy criticism for releasing suspects in high profile murder cases and in one instance, a suspect sought by police fled to Jordan’s home. In 2007, he released a suspect in the murders of five teenagers, saying that his office was unable to locate a key witness in the case. The New Orleans Police Department promptly produced the witness, who was in their custody all along. Later that same year, Jordan resigned.

But those are the high-profile cases. It’s those lawmakers and agency heads who try to fly just below the radar who sometimes are exposed as guilty of at least questionable behavior.

Whether it’s a legislator voting in favor of a bill that would benefit him financially or a pair of legislators swapping out Tulane scholarships in order to circumvent the prohibition against awarding the scholarships to family members, there are numerous conflicts of interest that often go unreported. Many public officials simply ignored that stipulation and put entire families through Tulane with the scholarships. (The families of former Crowley Judge Edmund Reggie and former New Orleans Mayor Moon Landrieu come to mind.)

But what could any more of a conflict than a legislator’s making it a common practice to sue the state? It would be akin to a member of the board of Wal-Mart, IBM, or Exxon suing their companies on behalf of clients who walk in off the street.

It’s assumed that legislators take an oath to protect the state fisc, or treasury, but that almost seems mythical these days. But don’t try to tell State Sen. Rob Marionneaux (D-Livonia) that. Not only does he sue the state on a regular basis, but he recently found himself in hot water when he attempted to negotiate a settlement between LSU and his client, Bernhard Mechanical. The State Board of Ethics said Marionneaux told LSU representatives that Bernard would accept $7.1 million from LSU and that he would secure a legislative appropriation of an additional $5.5 million.

The board further said that Marionneaux violated the law by not notifying the board that he was representing Bernard Mechanical. Marionneaux countered by saying he was not required to do so. He elaborated by saying the reporting requirement does not apply to lawyers who are legislators.

In June, however, even as the ethics board was investigating him, Marionneaux attempted to slip language into a bill that would eliminate requirements that he disclose his representation of Bernard to the board. The bill failed.

Perhaps then, it should be no surprise that Pastorek, who said he gave permission to Vallas to use the vehicle on the trips, said of the repayment, “I don’t think legally, technically, I have to, but my feeling is we need to get this behind us and move forward.”

A legislative auditor’s report said Vallas, who doesn’t fly, used the state-owned SUV for dozens of visits to family in Illinois and along the Gulf Coast from the time he was hired in July 2007 through April 2009. Vallas admitted to auditors that 31 of his 41 trips out of Louisiana were not work-related.

Vallas no longer has a state vehicle. Instead, he has been given a $2,200 per month car allowance in addition to his $252,689 yearly salary.

Considering the number of trips taken and time away from the office for Vallas, plus repairs to the Durango, Pastorek may have gotten off light with paying $4,185 (gasoline alone should have exceeded that amount).

If that’s not sufficiently magnanimous of Pastorek, a week later he graciously declined a pay raise after receiving a favorable review of his job performance by the Board of Elementary and Secondary Education but not before making it clear that he had earned the increase had he opted to take it.

It may have come as a surprise that he was even eligible for a pay increase when state classified workers were denied raises by the governor earlier this year. Pastorek, as a political appointee, is unclassified or non-civil service. His salary is $287,907, plus a housing allowance of $57,240 and a car allowance of $31,800. A 6 percent raise would have meant an additional $22,616 in annual compensation for Pastorek.

All things considered, it’s probably no surprise that a writer for the Chicago Tribune rated Louisiana worse than Illinois in public corruption.

Maybe new Southern University President Ronald Mason Jr. knew what he was doing when he brought his own lawyer onto the Southern payroll even as the university was laying off 50 employees.

Mason came to Southern from Jackson State University in Mississippi and brought both his Chief of Staff Evola Bates ($150,000 per year) and Executive Counsel Byron Williams ($120,000).

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At a meeting of the Joint Legislative Committee on the Budget during the legislative session earlier this year, House Speaker Jim Tucker popped in long enough to admonish fellow legislators (primarily state senators, it’s presumed) to “read the (state) Constitution.”

His remarks, however condescending they may or may not have been, were prompted by a running dispute he was having with Senate President Joel Chaisson in particular and the senate in general.

“Read the Constitution.” Terse, dramatic, patronizing. Exit left.

Now it turns out that Speaker Tucker might be advised to do some reading of his own.

Tucker, in a recent address in Monroe, blamed the Senate and Gov. Bobby Jindal for their failure to make deeper cuts in an attempt to mitigate next year’s anticipated $2 billion budgetary shortfall.

Speaking to the Monroe Chamber of Commerce on September 1, Tucker said of next year’s impending fiscal crisis, “We knew this was coming. We’ve been trying to manage this in the House for three years, but we were rebuffed by the Senate and the governor.

Tucker said the House had more significant cuts in the 2011 budget than the version ultimately approved after Jindal supported the Senate version, which, according to the House Speaker, used one-time money to postpone more severe cuts.

“So next year we’re going to deal with it as a crisis,” he said. “It’s not how I would have preferred to deal with it. I was disappointed, but we’ll deal with it as it comes.”

Perhaps Speaker Tucker should take his own advice and go back and read over HB 76 that passed the House by a vote of 88-0 and was signed by the governor as Act 41. HB 76, the ancillary appropriations bill, was the notorious bill that dumped some $33 million into local pork projects after additional funds were “found.”

Of that $33 million, Jindal managed to find 32 projects totaling less than $2.5 million that he could veto. Of the remaining $30 million-plus, $3.4 million was for local arts councils, $1.5 million was for local councils on aging, and another $12.8 million was appropriated for local parishes and municipalities, some of those with no explanation of how the money would be used. The City of Baton Rouge, for example, got two separate appropriations totaling $515,000 with no explanation of how the funds would be spent.

Of the appropriations for the councils on aging, $325,000 was for the Jefferson Council on Aging. Tucker is from Jefferson Parish.

The St. Landry School Board received $750,000 for “enhancements to public elementary and secondary education.”

The expenditures contained in HB 76, however, do not even approach the waste included in HB 1 (General Appropriations) and HB 2 (Capital Outlay).

Those two bills included, among other expenditures:

• $12 million for the Convention Center Complex in Shreveport;

• $6.1 million for the Baton Rouge Riverside Centroplex;

• $6.6 million for City Park Golf Complex in New Orleans;

• $6.12 million for golf course development in Westlake;

• $301,184 for Black Bear Golf Club at Poverty Point;

• $325,000 for promotion of the Audubon Golf Trail;

• $5,000 for the Delhi Municipal Golf Course;

• $200,000 for Junior Golf training facilities in Shreveport;

• $1.17 million for repairs to Zephyrs baseball facilities in Jefferson Parish;

• $17.5 million for professional sports facilities in Jefferson and Orleans parishes;

• $1 million for a recreational complex in Iberia Parish;

• $1.4 million for baseball stadium improvements in Baton Rouge.

Baton Rouge has no baseball team.

Is this House Speaker Jim Tucker’s idea of fiscal responsibility?

Read the bill, Mr. Speaker. Read the bill.

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