Louisiana Voice

The House Wednesday approved the first step toward preventing another event like the Jan. 6,2021, Capitol riot by narrowly passing the overhaul of the 135-year-old Electoral Count Act by a 229-203 vote.

The very fact that the only Republican votes were cast by nine members who are leaving Congress this year illustrates how committed the 203 party members who voted against the bill are to getting themselves reelected as opposed to putting country over party.

Their vote also exposes their complete and total fealty to Donald Trump who, at best, is damaged goods, but still wields considerable influence over tens of millions of voters perfectly willing to overlook their leader’s corruption and felonious and treasonous behavior.

H.R. 8873, aka the Presidential Election Reform Act, updates the law that governs Congress’s electoral vote count by the states, the final step under the Constitution to confirm the results of a presidential election, and over which thousands of rioters, encouraged by Trump, stormed the Capitol on Jan. 6 in an effort to halt that process.

The House bill would, among other things, raise the threshold to consider an objection to a state’s electoral votes to one-third of both the House and Senate. A similar Senate bill yet to be considered would require only one-fifth of both chambers to agree to a challenge. Each is more stringent than the current rules.

Significantly, while Republican members of both the House and Senate have claimed massive fraud in the presidential voting in which Joe Biden defeated Trump, not one of those representatives or senators who ran successfully for election or reelection have claimed fraud in their own electoral success.

In the lead-up to the House vote on the bill, GOP leaders, among them Republican Whip Steve Scalise, R-Louisiana, called on their members to oppose the bill.

“In their continued fixation to inject the Federal government into elections, this legislation runs counter to reforms necessary to strengthen the integrity of our elections,” read a statement from Scalise’s office in calling for Republicans to vote “no” on the bill. (Well, the reforms are for a federal election, after all.)

And the sheep, with the exception of those nine who are moving on and thus, had no political capital to lose, obeyed like any loyal Trump lap dog.

Among those who got the message were all five Republican House members from Louisiana: KKK Scalise, Feet of Clay Higgins, Mike “Tattoo” Johnson, Julia Letlow and Garret Graves. Only Democrat Troy Carter saw the need for election integrity and voted in favor of the bill.

This says that five of Louisiana’s six U.S. representatives have no problem with the possibility of another storming of the Capitol:

Folks, it’s really pathetic when a single individual commands the hearts and minds of an entire body of people. When one person, no matter how good or bad, whether well- or ill-intentioned, can literally control the actions of millions of people – or a group of legislators – we’re already so far down the rabbit hole that we may never again see daylight.

History has shown us time and time again what can happen when an entire society marches in lockstep with any leader. I don’t have to recite the names of those despots, because you know who they are.

When a body of lawmakers acts as though they are in some sort of hypnotic trance in order to curry the favor of any person, when party unity is given greater preference than national interests, when the objective no longer is what’s best for the country but instead, devolves into let’s undermine every proposal put forward by the opposition, when loyal opposition becomes seething hatred, then, by God, we’re no longer a great nation, but a third-world country, what the former guy would describe us, a “s**thole country.”

I love this country dearly but when I see the mindset of our leaders of both parties, I despair for its future and for the future of my children and grandchildren.

And before anyone suggests it, no, I’m not leaving for Venezuela or Russia. That’s such a trite, kneejerk response, and completely invalidates any argument you might put forth.

No, I prefer to remain here to try to make my country a better, saner place to live.

If we can’t point out our warts, blemishes, and deficiencies when we see them, then freedom becomes just an empty word devoid of any meaning. That’s why, when I realized the Republican Party wasn’t the same party I’d joined 40 years before, I bolted for a party that I find to be only marginally better. These days I refer to myself simply as a recovering Republican.

At least I haven’t found a Ted Cruz, a Jim Jordan, a Mitch McConnell, or a Marjorie Taylor-Greene among its membership yet.

The announcement last week that the state had, at long last, settled the class-action lawsuit with victims the 1983 flood who lost their homes and businesses because of the damming effect of Interstate 12 which they said impeded the flow of floodwaters was of more than passing interest to me.

I began working for the state’s insurance agency, the Office of Risk Management, in January 1991 and that case, already seven years old, was one I inherited on Day One and which was still an open case when I retired in 2011.

(Another one I inherited that ultimately resulted in a multi-million-dollar settlement involved a couple returning home on a rural road after partying late into the night. She was apparently very tired because she had her head in his lap when he became distracted and ran off the road, flipping his vehicle and ejecting her, causing crippling injuries.)

The flood case was bounced around with the original defense attorney being replaced after failing to argue that the Interstate was built to federal specifications and that the proper party to sue would have been the feds.

Then, when it finally went to trial, the state’s hydraulics expert showed up to testify without the proper computer program in his possession. Inadvertently left back in his home in Colorado, it would have been used to illustrate parameters and data which he said would be in the state’s favor.

Instead, he fumbled and stumbled his way through testimony, attempting to ad lib his testimony but fooling no one, especially the presiding judge who nearly held the poor guy in contempt.

Following that debacle, I felt the state should file a claim with his errors and omissions insurer.

As a point of clarification, contractors with the state, be they attorneys, physicians, constructors, or experts in myriad litigation cases, are required to offer proof that they carry what is called E&O (errors and omissions) coverage for any possible commissions of malpractice or other screw-ups.

Except for whatever reason, this expert had never been asked about his E&O verification or else, just failed to provide it. That’s what I learned when I called and asked him about his coverage. And there was no point in pursuing him for any liability because he certainly did not have the financial resources to atone for such a multi-million-dollar oversight.

So, bottom line, the jury awarded $92 million (plus judicial interest, which began on the day the lawsuit was filed and would not end until final payment was made) to the 1,246 victims of the flood, victims who included 400 families and 96 businesses. Interest is not paid on settlements such as that reached last week.

When judicial interest was added in, the total award came to about $150 million — 30 years ago.

Last week’s settlement was for $95 million, plus $6 million the state has previously placed into an account for the plaintiffs, making a total settlement of $101 million.

The award was made during the administration of the late Gov. Mike Foster, who determined that the state simply could not afford to write a check for such a momentous award.

That was before the state had what is known as excess coverage. That’s an insurance policy the state buys to cover awards north of $5 million. Under such coverage, the state would be liable for the first $5 million with the excess insurer being on the hook for the balance.

The problem with that was the excess insurer had a pesky habit of refusing to honor such claims, basing their position on the argument that the state should have settled for a lower amount when settlement was still an option. Because of difficulties with excess carriers, the state dropped such coverage for a while but, I believe, resumed its coverage a few years later.

But at the time of the judgment, the state had never had excess coverage, so it was obligated for the full $150 million award and Foster just said nope, the state wasn’t gonna pay it.

And that’s the way it rocked along for my entire 20-year tenure as nursemaid to the file. Occasionally, the Risk Director would drop by my cubicle and ask that I run the interest calculations to the current date to learn what the latest amount owed was.

The last time I ran the figures, I recall that the amount due had swollen to about $250 million or so – a quarter-billion-dollars. Those periodic calculations were simply exercises in futility as no effort was ever made to pony up any money for the plaintiffs. In the 11 years since my retirement, the amount had grown to more than $330 million, according to State Rep. Bill Wheat, R-Ponchatoula, making that $101 settlement something of a bargain for the state.

And bear in mind, these occasional interest runs occurred during the latter stages of the Jindal administration when the state was dead broke and Jindal was grabbing money from several state agencies (like the Office of Group Benefits, which saw its $500 million surplus evaporate under Jindal) just to keep the lights on. Restrooms were being stocked with fragments of toilet paper rolls stolen from other restrooms in something reminiscent of a game of musical toilet seats.

The lead plaintiff attorney once called me to attempt to negotiate a settlement and because was a clear violation of prohibitions of ex parte contact (any action taken in a legal proceeding without the participation of the other side’s attorney), he nearly got disbarred, but managed to convince the disciplinary board that he thought I was an attorney. Called to testify against him, I could only say I could not read his mind and if he said he thought I was an attorney, I had no way to dispute that.

The final settlement amount was negotiated by the administration of Gov. John Bel Edwards who, perhaps not coincidentally, is a native of Tangipahoa Parish

(Full disclosure: I was a lousy claims adjuster, the B.S. efforts by the agency attorney to blow smoke up my toga by once calling me “one of the best” notwithstanding, and my “retirement” most probably preceded by a few days my being shown the door because of my having launched this blog just weeks before.)

“There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies, and statistics.”

It’s a familiar quote that has been attributed to several people, including British Prime Minister Benjamin Disraeli, though it was popularized by writer Mark Twain.

Donald Trump has perfected the dark art of damned lies, but Louisiana’s junior U.S. senator, John Neely Kennedy has elevated his game to statistics.

You remember John Neely Kennedy, don’t you? He’s one of the senators who voted not to validate the 2020 presidential election despite an embarrassing lack of evidence of election fraud.

He’s also the one who voted against helping sick veterans who had been exposed to toxic burn pits while fighting George W. Bush’s war in Iraq.

He’s also the only Louisiana senator (along with all five Repugnantcan House members) who voted against the $1.2 trillion bipartisan infrastructure bill. Sen. Bill Cassiday voted in favor of the measure that will result in nearly $7.3 billion in infrastructure funding, Kennedy’s “statistics” notwithstanding.

A mere three weeks ago (Aug. 28) the Natchitoches Times newspaper published a page-one story about Kennedy’s Aug. 24 address to chamber of commerce members.

In what must have been a true inspirational address, what with his affection of dogs and weed killer and his disdain for pink-haired Washington reporters, Democrats (he used to be one), and liberals (he was once one of those, too, until the political winds shifted, whispering in his ear that he was unelectable in Louisiana as either one of those).

After a couple of disappointing losses as a Democrat, he got himself appointed revenue secretary by Gov. Mike Foster. In 1999, he ran successfully for state treasurer despite his oopsie claim in a TV campaign ad that as revenue secretary, he “reduced paperwork for small businesses by 150 percent.” The ad was quickly pulled when a listener reminded his campaign that it was mathematically impossible to “reduce” anything by more than 100 percent – unless, of course, your strategy was to give some of that paperwork back to those small businesses.

Keep in mind, if you will, this is the same guy who was asking Louisiana citizens to let him handle the state’s finances. That would seem to require quite a leap of faith, considering that embarrassing math boo-boo.

He’s also the one who in 2004 endorsed Democratic presidential candidate John Kerry over George W. Bush. Of course, that was about three years before he heard those political winds and switched overnight from liberal Democrat to conservative Repugnantcan and later to “110 percent in support of Donald Trump” to quietly omitting any mention of the living tanning bed warning label.

I’m not exactly certain when he began to look and sound like Randy Quaid as Cousin Eddie in those Vacation movies, but it’s safe to say he’s honed his act to perfection – if you like that kind of “leadership.”

But back to those statistics from his address to the Natchitoches chamber.

Ever the fiscal conservative (except when bringing home the pork), Kennedy, with a nod to the state’s senior senator, said that he and Cassidy had worked closely together to siphon off (okay, he didn’t really say siphoned – it was more like obtain, or appropriate) every red cent possible for the gret stet of Loozeraner. He said in the past five years (which just happens to coincide with the time he has been a U.S. senator), the state has received $20 billion for disaster relief (except, of course, for the Lake Charles area, which has been largely forgotten) and another $3.5 billion for roads and bridges with (and this is where he really gets into the “damn lies” part of political rhetoric) “not one penny from the fake infrastructure bill.”

Well, no, not yet. The bill wasn’t signed into law until last November and the pipeline doesn’t just open up and allow the money to pour in immediately. Anyone who knows anything about the federal government knows that – even Kennedy. It will be paid out over a five-year period, but here’s the breakdown of money earmarked for Louisiana in case anyone’s interested in learning what the state will ACTUALLY GET:

• Highway funding: $4.8 billion;
• Bridge replacement and repairs: 1.013 billion;
• Improvement of public transportation: $470 million over five years;
• Electric vehicle charging networks: $73 million over five years;
• Broadband infrastructure: $100 million (remember Bobby Jindal rejected $80 for that purpose);
• Wildfire protection: $20 million over five years;
• Cyberattack protection: $17 million;
• Water infrastructure improvements: $580 million over five years;
• Airport development: $179 million over five years.

For a guy who claimed to the chamber members that “You’re not completely free if you can’t say what you want or express yourself,” John Neely Kennedy certainly seizes every opportunity to pass on his down-home wisdom. Even when he distorts the picture with damn lies and statistics.

It would be nice, though, if Kennedy would grow up and talk to us like an adult instead of insulting the cumulative intelligence of this state with his pseudo-Will Rogers homilies.

Just a quick thought: Former presidents are given Secret Service protection for life.

If The Orange Jesus, aka Forrest Trump, goes to prison, a Secret Service detail must be assigned to him on a 24/7 basis. That will mean one or more agents must be by his side constantly — for yard exercise (Frump exercise? gimme a break), work detail (would love to see him on the cafeteria serving line or in the prison laundry), meal time, even in his cell (we wouldn’t want cellmate Bubba to develop an amorous attraction to the talking yam and making him his b***ch, now would we?).

Taking the thought a bit further, with the sudden unexplained and (I’m sure) strictly coincidental erasure of all those Secret Service text messages from Jan. 6, I would venture that such an assignment would be something akin to karma.

As we head into the final seven weeks leading up to the Nov. 8 congressional elections, we have 12 candidates challenging Foghorn Leghorn Kennedy for the U.S. Senate and seven challengers for U.S. Rep. All Hat, No Cattle Clay Higgins in Louisiana’s 3^rd Congressional District.

The remaining incumbents, with the exception of Rep. Mike “Tattoo” Johnson up in northwest Louisiana’s 4^th district, have what would basically be called only token opposition. Johnson didn’t attract any challengers in what is a solid red district and Louisiana’s other senator, Bill Cassidy isn’t up for reelection for a couple of years.

I’ll get to Kennedy and, in the words of one of LouisianaVoice’s readers, his Randy Quaid impersonation presently but first, a few words about Higgins and his ability to embellish his credentials as well as his hero, Don of Orange, aka the Great White Dope.

Higgins, who claimed one committee hearing, to have been responsible for “thousands of arrests” during his stellar career as a law enforcement officer for a small-town police department and as public information officer for the St. Landry Sheriff’s Department (his former boss, the St. Landry Parish sheriff told LouisianaVoice the number of Higgins collars was closer to “half-a-dozen, at best”).

But never mind his terrorizing the criminal element in and around St. Landry. Let’s fast forward to today (Sept. 20) and Higgins’s claim that he and some of his unnamed House colleagues “have very thick files” that tell the real story of the Jan. 6, 2021 insurrection and that the “involvement of actors that have not yet been held to account, and that’s precisely what we’re going to do.”

Higgins declined to name any of those supposed colleagues but did say he possessed “a four-inch-thick file” on the investigation that he said was the product of his investigation. “…[I]t’s going to be revealed,” he said. “It’s going to be addressed, very likely people are going to go to jail.”

Well, Congressman, some people involved in the events of that day are already in jail. Some of those are members of the Proud Boys who have been convicted for their part in that Jan. 6 debacle. Or didn’t your “investigation” turn up that bit of information?

The obvious question is if Higgins has such damning information, why hasn’t he shared those findings with anyone? He says his information is not complete yet. Well, if it’s not sufficiently complete to share, it would seem that there simply is not sufficient evidence to change anything — or to make inflammatory statements about what the report may or may not contain. Higgins is a doofus with not a shred of credibility. The only difference between him and Marjorie Taylor-Green and Lauren Boebert is gender.

But LouisianaVoice has received reliable information that Higgins’s “investigation” has revealed that the insurrection was launched by cleverly-disguised (as Proud Boys, Oath Keepers, etc.) left-wing anarchists from two fronts: the pedophile headquarters in the basement of a Washington pizzeria and from a grassy knoll in Dallas and that the leaders were John Kennedy, Jr., and Elvis, who were actually working undercover on behalf of President Rancid Velveeta and Rudy “Meet Me at the Four Seasons Lawn and Garden Center” Giuliani. (I’m pretty sure that’s about as reliable has the contents of his report.)

Now, if only Higgins had exerted as much energy to obtaining federal assistance for the victims of those two hurricanes that devastated Lake Charles and adjacent Cameron Parish in 2020. It’s been two years and little has been done to aid in recovery efforts – and that’s on Higgins, because it’s his district. He’s done little other than run his mouth like the idiot he most surely is.

Now, let’s talk about Randy Quaid John Kennedy. This is the guy who voted against certification of the 2020 election results despite having zero evidence that there was fraud (other than that “investigative file” in Higgins’s possession — which he didn’t, and still doesn’t, have).

Here’s a guy who, in almost six years in office, has rarely appeared in Louisiana and had never (until last week) sent any kind of mailer to his constituents to inform them (us) of developments in his office. But now that his reelection is looming and he has a serious challenger, a nice, four-page mailer that trumpets his work to reduce violent crime, combat drug overdoses, halting human trafficking, lowering the cost of prescription drugs, fighting inflation, and protecting Louisiana families suddenly appeared in my mailbox.

The beauty of it was that the mailer was sent out free of any cost to Kennedy via his franking privileges. None of his 12 challengers has the advantage of being able to send out a million or so campaign mailers at no cost. (And he didn’t see any need to communicate with the folks back home until election time.)

But give Kennedy credit: he knows how to appeal to the masses. His reelection ad is a beaut. He likes dogs. Well, guess what? I like dogs, too, but that does not qualify me as a member of the most prestigious club in the world. And neither does sprinkling in those defiant “by Gods” stand one in good stead for the Senate. Both look/sound good. Not so his passing attempt at being folksy but instead was just a asinine reference to “pink-haired” Washington reporters; that just sounds incredibly stupid and bigoted. The entire ad is devoid of any real substance or reasons why anyone should vote for a candidate solely on his flimsy, cheap imitation of homespun philosophy. Will Rogers he ain’t — he comes off more like Cousin Eddie from those Vacation movies.

But remember, too, John Kennedy also is the guy who voted against help for military veterans exposed to toxic burn pits in Iraq. You remember Iraq, don’t you? That’s the war we started on faulty intelligence that George W. Bush, Donald Rumsfeld, and Karl Rove had but chose to ignore. The result was 20 years of war that cost trillions of dollars and thousands of American lives while enriching military contractors.

But if the events of Jan. 6, 2021, the discovery of top-secret documents at Mar-a-Lago, and the Supreme Court’s Roe v. Wade decision have done anything, it’s caused the Repugnantcans to reassess their sanctimonious positions and to reboot their campaign strategies.

In case you haven’t noticed, Kennedy, who ran in 2016 as being “110 percent in support of Donald Trump,” has not so much as breathed the Orange Caligula’s name even though the Great Orange Hairball of Fear did offer up his endorsement of Foghorn Leghorn – for whatever minimal value that may still carry. I reckon Kennedy has ridden the Dorito Donald hoss about as far as he can, all things considered.

Kennedy loves to wax philosophical. But he should remember that nostalgia ain’t what it used to be. Sometimes you just have to produce in order to hold your job.