As one who has been bombarded with multiple solicitations – that’s multiple on a daily basis, sometimes as many as a dozen in a day – from Donald Trump, the Republican Party and various national Republican candidates, it really came as no surprise when a friend sent me a solicitation she received from House Speaker Mike Johnson in which he was hawking purple and gold “Geaux Speaker” lapel buttons for $10 a pop.
The Louisiana Grifter’s come-on opened by saying, “Ever since I officially became the Speaker of the House, conservative grassroots supporters have been reaching out to me non-stop, asking how to show their support.”
Yeah, I just bet.
If that doesn’t sound like Trump 2.0, I don’t know what does. It appears that he literally took Trump’s pitch and substituted his own name.
“I am so excited to announce that you can officially rock your Official Speaker Merchandise,” he gushed.
“If you want to say Geaux Speaker with a game day pin…
“If ou want to drink a cup of joe out of a cup of Mike mug…
“If you want to keep the Speaker top of mind with a branded hat…
“We’ve got you covered! Just check out our newly launched Speaker Store.”
Still wondering what he meant by keeping the speaker “top of mind,” I made a visit to his “SPEAKER STORE.”
My Gawd.
It’s the K-Mart of grifting, the dollar store of gauche. Well, as they say, one man’s junk is another man’s…junk. All designed to extract dollars from people who, for the most part, can’t afford it and for whom Johnson is literally doing nothing in Washington. Just like Trump.
He’s got “I Like Mike” red, white and blue buttons (strikingly similar to the “I Like Ike” buttons of 1952 and ’56 (kind of a rip-off, really), “I Like Mike” coffee mugs, “Speaker Mike coffee mugs (two designs), “I Like Mike” Tees (long and short-sleeved). More lapel pins, baseball caps, bumper stickers, tote bags, beanies, drink koozies (non-alcoholic only, I assume), fleece pullovers, sweats and Lord knows what else – all emblazoned with some variation of Mike Johnson’s name or image. Most of his merch is in the $10-$15 range but some of his crap runs as high as $50.
With each item is the assurance that the product was “Made in America,” but then, anyone can say that. I have to wonder if they really are, but I won’t belabor the point. But for the dignity of a public office, it’s enough to gag a maggot. As a pure measure of bad smell, this idea could knock a buzzard off a s**t wagon at a hundred yards.
But what can you expect from someone whose lips move only when Trump’s hand moves and who has an app on his phone to keep him from checking out Internet porn?
And to complete the trifecta, we have Kyle Duncan, a pal of Johnson’s from LSU Law School days. The two worked together on behalf of the religious right to overturn federal abortion laws.
Duncan not only is anti-women’s rights, but is also a rabid anti-LGBTQ activist in a day and age when society, if not Duncan and Johnson, has come to the realization that not everyone is cookie-cutter identical to what they prefer in gender, color, or philosophy. They don’t understand that love need not be defined by gender; they have never suffered discrimination in hiring, housing, or any of the myriad ways in which a person can feel pain through indifference, slight, or downright hostility. They have no appreciation that other religions have every right that Christian do or that we have the right to no religion if we so choose.
The Biblical arguments of Johnson and Duncan on behalf of the religious right just don’t ring true. A couple of major characters in the Bible, after all, appeared to have had (gasp!) homosexual tendencies and quite a number of them, including David, Christ’s ancestor, were guilty of adultry in violation of every tenet the religious right holds dear.
In 2018, Trump appointed Duncan to a judgeship on the Fifth US Circuit Court of Appeals which encompasses the states of Texas, Louisiana and Mississippi.
Trouble is, Duncan does not reside in either of those states, choosing instead to make his residence in his McLean, Virginia, home he and his wife purchased for $790,000 in September 2016. Do we not have a residency requirement? Or at least the expectation?
But apparently, that’s okay. I mean, after all, Alabama Sen. Tommy Tupperware lives not in Alabama but in Florida.
We don’t know where Cancun Cruz is.
And we don’t know for sure who George Santos really is.
But the man who Johnson succeeded as Speaker really takes the prize.
In an address on Sunday and later in a posing on X, Rep. Kevin McCarthy, the California Republican, nee Speaker, apparently after checking out a Rhonda Santis-approved high school history book, DECLARED that “In every single war that America has fought, we have never asked for land afterwards.”
Whoa.
Native Americans might disagree with that and Mexico might decide it wants all or parts of Texas, New Mexico, Nevada, California, Utah, Arizona, Colorado, Oklahoma, Kansas and Wyoming back.
And how does McCarthy think the US acquired the territories of Guam, Puerto Rico and the Philippines?
McCarthy is dangerously close to making Clay Higgins look intelligent by comparison.
Now excuse me while I visit the Mike Johnson Store to pick out a pair of “I Like Mike” gold-plated tin medallion earrings for my wife’s Christmas present. At five bucks, they’re a bargain.
Excellent remarks and the full truth about goings on in the Capitol city. Why hasn’t someone complained about the residence failures? These men are hardly shy in being public figures
I assume he had a healthy ego before his ascension to Speaker and his store proves it has grown. It will never rival that of his secular master, but still…
All this would come to a halt if people would stop buying their “bill of goods” and electing them to office. Until the head nincompoop is dead and gone, it will, unfortunately continue.
I can’t wait for Biden to be gone either. Good point.
Huh? Politicians are fundraising? Next thing you’ll write about are dancing strippers. Fundraising isn’t the story that will catch your reader’s attention, but the abortion portion of your story is a can of worms worth opening. You seem fairly familiar with the English language, so surely you know the phrase “We support a woman’s right to chose” is missing the direct object. I’ll supply it here-murder. Our laws are even clear on this point. If I’m a bank robber and walk into a bank and shoot a pregnant transgender man (tailor made example for your audience) I am charged with two counts of murder. on a personal murder I think Democrat abortions, euthanasia, and all tools of death should be afforded. All these manners should be illegal for everyone else. Let the comments flow!!
Staying on topic, I’d be curious to know how much money Johnson has pulled in peddling “Speaker” merchandise online.
Late comment. I wonder why there has been no mention of Judge Darrell White and his association with Johnson?? I have the utmost respect toward Judge White . thanks ron thompson